Saturday, July 18, 2009

Reflection

Rarely in my blogging do I ever really give any insight into "who I am". It is more of a " what I do" or "what I have done" sort of sharing. I guess from the beginning I thought of my blog as a way to escape from the everyday things that troubled me, focusing instead on the activities that filled my life and not the reality of daily living. But this morning I have been thinking, and I am realizing, maybe for the first time, that all of the so called "activities" of late are moving me towards a common purpose....... self sufficiency. It is something I could never accomplish working in a mainstream position. I worked from dusk til dawn, on call 24 hours a day 7 days a week, and in the end I was never ahead financially, I was just barely scraping by and spending a lot of time away from my child. Certainly, as a single mother of 1, my working outside the home was necessary to provide for my family. But I can honestly tell you that when I lost my job, 2 years ago, I wasn't gripped with fear over how I would survive or provide for my family, I was overcome with relief as if this huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders, and I had been given a second chance to start again. And now, 2 years later, I know that I am right where I should be, even though I am still lacking a steady income, I am no longer lacking in purpose. The needs of my family are being provided for through faith, and the path that I follow is being laid out before me through prayer. So this morning, as I sit in the quiet of the early hours, I am thankful for all that the Lord has provided, and pray that I will continue to seek Him first in all things.

Proverbs 3:5,6
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths.

Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

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